Of words and life

Humans are so complicated.

People constantly struggle and find a purpose to life. Some create this animated life for themselves, full of exaggeration. Some underplay it so much that you wonder if they are already dead. No matter which ways they try and get past, they always have friends, foes, family and loneliness. Love? Well it is inexplicably the reason for existence. Life can be simple, desire screws it up. I don't know which pattern defines me but I think if i could master the art of realizing that I have nothing to lose, I will win!Only to find win is not the soul I amlooking for.

Someone asked me what is love....and for the first time in my life I could not describe it. It was disturbing since I have spent pages all my life writing about it, endless hours talking about it and most of my life feeling it. Something has changed and I have realized I was betting my life on the wrong word all this while. The secret my friend, is not to bet on a word but chase all those words that after all are words too. My vocabulary of words and people has always been limited. Life is a cynic and me an optimist. I move into the night really wanting something, hopelessly knowing it will never come by. I already dislike this post and yet lazy I am, to delete it after all. Its just easy to click on "post"!

square frames

Whats with square frames that open out into the wilderness? I am sitting gazing at the sky feeling like I just discovered something. Smirking and talking to myself. Figured that life is after all a chase. Its always about making a choice and taking a stand. Not taking one is again a stand and choosing not to choose is a choice too. I wonder what makes me tick each day, though I know there is nothing I look forward to, I know I have to make a choice. I believe i have become lower and slower. I am happy, I met interesting glimpses from the past. I also think I am beginning to love the dance with my two left feet which just might be right! I connect, and suddenly I know what is it that I am trying to seek through this square frame.

Strangely, I can only want and desire and then its destiny. Being the number 8, I believe karma is what drives my life and no matter how much I desire, it will decide. I focus hard! still wishing that wanting will fetch:-) However, I do know ....and suddenly the wind gushes in and here I am prepared today, to after all see a shooting star!