Thursday, November 19, 2009

What is it that I seek

Its been maddening days with travel, work, weddings and a lot more happening at a pace that does not let me even experience it in totality. I am sure I will pause one of these days and look back and be surprised at how much has happened and how time has gone by. I am sure I will be left echoing to myself the constant question about what is it that I seek. Why is there this constant urge to pace through life and yet stand still trying to find answers.

I am in Hongkong and hope I can take some time off and explore the city. Met cousins after long time and painted the roads of Indore red. I enjoyed my second class travel, meeting people from Madhya Pradesh who I think have no characteristic feature distinguishing them when you look at them. They are best at merging. I met agriculture and seed sales men listening to Altaaf Raja like songs going on a weekend team outing to Delhi which seemed to be their high point. I was able to get off a station and have Poha and Jalebi sweetened like it was influenced from Gujrat. I heard Malwiya which cannot sound good unless you chewing on paan. I sipped on juice made of "paan" and met a girl from Chattisgarh who spends 6 months in Japan and yet was just how she was in Chattisgarh. These people I met had a strong character, a personality so distinct and yet so familiar and ordinary. Each one had an ambition and each one had to deal with reality which is so much more easier to feel than the ones I keep in my mind. Their reality was about experience and mine about thoughts.I have had so many experiences, conversations, observations and realized my heart is still not in fancy restaurants or meeting rooms. It is really here amidst noise, people and the raw. I wish to experience more and I guess for now at least that is what I seek.

Sunday, November 01, 2009

Two perfect strangers

Two perfect strangers, glare into each others eyes. Watch and see what they want to see. They delve deep, knowing there is no escape, explore as dangerously as they can. Sipping coffee in cafes, making excuses to move into each others spaces. Conversing like the world ceases to exist, waiting for it to rain, holding hands again. Impatiently looking at the watch late at night; waiting for the next day to come. Waiting to dress up in red or brown. Smiling at the world observing flowers and the starlit night. Holding each other tight, making love like crazy, kissing gently, slowing down to sink in that fragrance.
Two perfect strangers, glare into each others eyes with nothing really to say. They are as they were, strangers! This time knowing that's how they know each other best.

Passing by that street

I have traversed a zillion streets in my life time. Yet every street has a unique memory etched in my mind. Streets, your mode of transport and the music you play when you pass by, just set a context, a memory in your mind. All streets have a culture, so unique that it can only be experienced. Often who you cross that road with plays a role. Sometimes its just the thoughts and emotions you carry.


I drove past all places that looked so familiar and yet so out of context. Its funny, there are streets I have gone past a zillion times and yet never noticed that little flower that has always been looking out into my face. Billboards have changed, jungles are turned into black serpents that crawl across the city. Small houses have become large gigantic card like structures, space has become scarce. The smell from the air has changed and so has the perfume in my car. I pulled down the windows hoping to feel the raw! My nose struggled, maybe my eyes were just not supportive. In that moment of struggle I felt like a stranger today.I felt like it wasn't the roads but maybe "me" who has changed! The music continued to play, cars continued to honk, and I just sat there numb echoing - " Tumse yun milenge, humne socha na tha....aur yeah zindagi!"