Sunday, October 23, 2011

Staying Alive!

I am glad I want to write. The last few days just felt like I had lost me to a strange phenomenon! I had stopped listening to music and the excuse wasn't time but desire. I had stopped wanting to write and the excuse was not the lack of words but lack of thoughts. It was scary.

I looked in the mirror, wondering if this was really me. My wish of knowing what life would be without words or music had nearly come true! Funnily I looked just fine! Nothing had really stopped, nothing had really changed. Maybe I had even lost my ability to comprehend the change.

I have been wondering, why is it that we all live? Is life about the heart beating and time going by? How does one feel alive? Should I live beyond when my soul would be alive or should I be given a choice to end my life the day I want? I guess these are philosophical questions retorted by scientific answers and the law says we all should live and keep every soul on earth alive for as much as we can! We are all striving to keep life in our own ways. Why do we love conserving? Why do we not accept evolution? Why do we want to be high up in the food chain and look for means to be immortal? Any which ways, these questions had nothing to do with music or writing and yet I felt not any different without them.

However, when I woke up today, it was just another uninspiring day and when I stepped out, embraced the world, just like that - music came back, books did too and the writer in me is beginning to surface. However I know now, it is not the expressions or the art but something in 'me' that keeps me alive!

Good night world and have a lovely morning. I hope you wake up realizing you are in love or finding a case of money waiting to be spent! It might be fleeting, but that might give you a reason to be alive yet again!

Unusual Shadow!

Like a long unwinding snake, crawling across broken streets
Wading through the changing persona, that of splendor and then an emptiness
A black boxed extension of my universe, plays a song
Brings back a memory, a story, a desire!

I try to comprehend my own mind
I fail and give up wanting to just walk
I walk look, capture and click
I learn, I unlearn, I am drawn

In the background, I notice a face
Constantly hounding me with a smile
Following me, telling me, just being around
I think its my shadow and leave it to hound!

The sun sets just the way it rose
The moon creeps up shining in the sky
I see the face, still alive, wanting a peep!
At the hour when they say shadows go to sleep

I wonder what it is then?
Who is it I should have thought!
Instead I am lost writing an experience
The shadow was just my reason to not!


I know for most this is the most unusual form of poetry or prose, who cares I am glad I just expressed. After all my blog is my space, or so I think!

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Lyrics or Songs?

I am always torn between songs and lyrics and inevitably lyrics win. However lyrics with a bad tune just so dont!!!
Today an amazing singer passed away - Jagjit Singh. I loved his choice of Ghazals. I loved the poets he brought to life. I did think his song eventually sounded the same but there was a finesse in his voice which comes only as a natural gift. 

Poetry I believe has been my best friend even in times of distress, lulls and speed such as now. I have no time to realize where I am, I have no time to figure out how life will be tomorrow. I just know I am! in the moment. I do remember my past vividly though I wish I did not. I do make new memories every minute with no time to even savor them. There are lots of things I have stopped to do such as Run, Exercise and write. 

Since we are on the topic of poetry, I was reminded of Sri Harivansh Rai Bacchan and his poem 
Two songs of JS come back as a flash to me. 'Sarakti Jaaye hai ruk se naqaab, Aahista Aahista' and 'Tum ko dekha tho yeh khayaal aaya, zindagi dhoop tum ghana saaya'

Haala ki London ki sardi mai saaya nahin dhoop ki aarzoo hai! 
I am sure this would be one of those posts I will not be very proud of!:-)

Monday, October 03, 2011

London - As I see it

This city feels like the epicenter of a cultural volcano. Looks calm at the surface despite the molten, quasi states of a zillion tourists and the strong and lost identities of the immigrants! What constitutes this city? It is hard to describe - Maybe culture, Maybe trade, Maybe the feeling of belonging or the feeling of not finding it my own. For being a lover of art and culture - this feels like 'Mecca'. Today I am settled in and feel like I am beginning to belong. I have managed to watch a few plays, a few concerts, walked down most known streets. I have a list of must do's for myself before I set foot into the wilderness of the globe yet again.

- Watch all my favorite artists perform
- Watch the wicked, phantom of the opera and a few not so advertised but still awesome plays
- Finish up my short course in art direction
- Learn the piano and a few other instruments. Indulge in Music - Classical Forms, Percussion!
- Walk Zone 1 and 2 of London over a weekend!
- Take the night bus more often
- Get as many seats as possible for the London Jazz Festival.

Clicked a few pictures to remember how this journey started! Just like London says - All of you are welcome as long as you are in transit!